Sam de Brito, who thinks that all men are liars except for him, has one of his usual hectoring, shrilly shaming and effectively manopausal meltdown posts. That Sam is the classic example of a mangina should go without saying but you’ve got to read his post to understand why.

Apparently Sam got some spam email recently from a dating website and being the ever vigilant manbag he his ,quickly put on his blouse, tousled his hair, challengingly cocked his head and got to work challenging the premises of this outrageous email.

Samantha found that the spam and its associated website was a “…cynically crafted mating cry to a particular type of Aussie male; one who wishes he wore the pants, picked the colour and then told his missus to wash and iron them.” Hey that’s me and just about every bloke I know. What’s wrong with us? Sam will know.

He/she challenges the first premise, Family Values. The spamming dating site lures men with the contention that “Over-independence and feminism have not spoiled Russian women’s belief in traditional family values. Unlike their Western sisters they still put family ahead of career.” Howls of indignation follow from Spammed Sam and no doubt his Sex in the City girlfriends gathered around their Chai Teas at the local Gloria Jeans to cackle in derision with him.

Sam contends that “…it’s a special kind of stupid who would argue that equality or independence has spoiled anybody.” Equality certainly may have been a causal factor in Sam not being able to support his statements with an argument and some facts as men in time immemorial have always attempted to do. He makes an especially feminine type of argument by merely stating his opposition as enough in and of itself to dispel any notion contrary to his own, and to preface that opposition with a shaming slur.

That is the extent of his argument against Family Values being a desirable trait that Western men find in women.

The spamming website, no doubt knowing their target market well,  determined that Western men find that Western women have been spoiled, as in ruined, by equality and independence. No doubt if they are wrong in this conclusion their campaign will die. As it is though Sam concludes later that “My point with all of this is that there seems to be a demand for this service.” Well now Sam, wouldn’t that suggest that there must be some element of truth to the conjecture, at least in the eyes of Western men? So what are you railing against? Western men rooting Russian women? What’s it to you? Oh right, this is just your method of getting laid by the independent and equal women in your circle. I wonder what his success rate is.

Sam moves on to the next factor: Age Difference. The spamming website states for Russian women an age difference of “10 to 15 years is regarded as absolutely normal by Russian women.” And Sam’s argument, after conceding the attraction of younger women: why can’t an Ozzie “just pull off the same feat locally?” Well that was answered previously Sam, please pay attention and stop dismissing things just because your hormones are running with this month’s cycle: Western women are equal and independent, they don’t want regular, working men who don’t regularly workout in the gym and spend their time preening themselves with hair product and makeup. They want fit, nubile, bad boys. Go ask Bingle what sort of bloke she’s after and you might learn a thing or two.

Seemingly Sam doesn’t really object to this premise but rather finds that it would be hard to keep said Russian girl once she lands in this country and “twig[s] on to the character flaws that led him to resort to flying her in?” Character flaws? Again with the shaming language. Maybe the character flaw is that in this country women are equal and independent and that makes the man this website is marketing to unattractive to them, the equal and independent women. But that would be too obvious for Shaming Sam to see.

Sam goes on to find it “creepy” (a girly word if ever there was one) that Russian women are “easier to get” as in “With 10,000,000 more Russian women than Russian men currently living in Russia the number and variety of Russian brides available to you is just huge.” Sounds to me like men’ve got an increased chance of success there but Sam finds it demeaning, poor little kitten that she is, and likens this to a “Bunnings advertisement…”. That’s what it is you handbag, a mega store for Russian women. That’s the point the spamming dating website is trying to get across.

And finally, drum roll please, Russian women are Caucasian! Sam screams in a swooning fit “this is bordering on racist.” It’s not bordering Sam, it is racist. Rationally so. Millions of years of evolution yet Sam castigates nature as offensive in that people are attracted to their own kind. In Sam’s world dateless men should keep an eye out for Hottentots and Pygmies as well. They’ve got vaginas too and can just as easily iron your shirts. Well, you’d have to help the Pygmy lower the ironing board, maybe even get her one of those hotel ones that sit just above the floor.

Failing to have made any argument opposing what he finds offensive, Sam inadvertently compounds the reasonable premises of the offending website with his own sourced  statistics: “the number of Russian spouse visas issued has also soared during the past five years. In 1999-2000, the Department of Immigration granted 64 female and 21 male spouse visas to Russian nationals marrying Australian citizens. By 2003-04, there were 443 female and 99 male visas granted – a rise of almost 700 per cent.”, Sam’s dramatic dénouement is as follows:

“It also makes me wonder whether, if you can’t find the traits you want among the 10 million or so Aussie women in this country – and you have to go looking overseas for someone to personify them – then maybe the traits are the problem, not the women.”

Ah yes, the shame the shame. Poor old Aunty Sam struggles in her pyjamas to get her dressing gown on and hurl abuse at the men mowing their lawns down the street. “Shutup!” “What’s wrong with you, stop making all that noise! I’ve got some crocheting to do and this weeks Oprah and sudoku to get through!”

What Sam really finds offensive is that he has reconstructed himself to fit into the gender neutral workplace and he’s unhappy, kinda gay in a metro way, unfulfilled and childless. He is not a man, certainly not a father, hates himself for it, and wants to ruin it for everyone else just like he ruined himself.

Maybe Sam should consider that the manly thing as always is: if you can’t find what you are after locally, go West young man (and old alike), go to the ends of the earth to get exactly what you want. That is the manly spirit of the pioneers and explorers who founded and found this country. The men Sam hates don’t like what they see around them and, being men, won’t accept it as a fait accompli. They have gone looking for what they desire elsewhere. And Sam hates them with a vengeance for it.

Meanwhile Sam, contrastingly,  waits at home on his girlfriend, if he has one, preparing Tapas and other delicious delights from his library of ABC cookbooks. His old cougar girlfiend, once she gets back from the prowl, no doubt is delighted to have her little eunuch waiting and  wagging at home for her every word and order. Sad, sad, Sam.

Aussies males, I salute you. Go the Russian if you can’t get an Ozzie girl. There’s no shame in it. Have kids, build a home and a life for the future racial prosperity of our kind. Go West!

(I hope Sam doesn’t pay this much attention to all his spam. Get on with it mate. Do something productive with your day. Build something, anything, be a man for Christ’s sake.)

Maybe Mangan’s 50 year old virgin should check out Spammed Sam’s Russian dating agency.